For the past two weeks I’ve been in turmoil. I’ve been feeling like the gentleman in the elevator, only worse. I had to decide on one of two choices. Either carry on with what I’ve been building for the past 3 years. Or walk away from it and start afresh.
Every one, EVERY ONE wanted me to go with the first choice. And it feels terrible. It’s like the gentleman in the elevator. Everyone is standing in one direction and I’m in the opposite direction. Do you know how uncomfortable this feels? I’m constantly wondering how long I will be able to resist changing directions…
Their rationale for standing in the opposite direction is: Tarek, this is what you do. It’s what you’re good at. And it is better this way. Tarek, you’re wrong to do otherwise.
Better… interesting word.
If you’ve done NLP training or life coaching courses, you’ll have learnt how to listen to ‘comparative deletions’. It’s when someone compares something to nothing. Like saying: it’s better!
Here’s my advice to you. Do NOT let this word pass you by unchallenged. Whenever someone tells you: it’s just better; challenge them. Ask them: better than what?!
You see so far even though everybody thinks it is better I turn to their direction, no one has given me a satisfactory enough justification to why I should that.
And what’s worse is that I’ve been slowly complying to what everyone else has been influencing upon me. I’ve been slowly turning around to face the direction that everyone is facing. Why?
I was afraid
To get a better understanding of fear and to learn how to deal with it, read a previous post titled ‘You’re Too Scary’ here.
I was literally feeling the fear run through me as I typed these words and thought: What if everyone was right and I was wrong? What if I failed? What if I lost everything that I’ve built for the past 3 years for nothing? What would happen then? Would it have been worth removing my safety net from underneath me and taking a big leap into the unknown?
I guess I’ll have to find out. Just thinking about this made me anxious, got my stomach in knots, my heart pounding and my palms sweating. I was afraid of going against the tide, challenging what everyone thinks right and setting off on my own. I wasn’t sure I can stand against what everyone else believes is good for me and just do the opposite which I KNOW, deep in my heart, is best for me.
Have you ever let what others think stop you from doing what you want? Or…
Have you ever gone against what everyone said, so you can do what you want?
Please share you experiences with us in the comment box below.
Eventually I made up my mind. And it was the moment of decision that turned my fear into excitement. Now I can’t wait to embark on my new adventure. Do you remember when you were a kid and your birthday was the next day and you were just too excited to sleep? You just couldn’t wait to get to your birthday party. That’s how I feel right now. I just can’t wait to get started!
As Richard Branson says: “Screw it, let’s do it”. I’m going to do it. Wish me luck.
Until next time,
Copyright (c) 2010 www.TarekCoaching.com – Life coach, life coaching, RESULTS Coach, Performance Consultant, Master Practitioner of Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP)